| What do you do with this? Our hot water heater had to be changed so the laundry room had to be somewhat cleaned out. I found layers of life in the broom closet, things that were, through the years, hastily thrown in there for safe keeping and perhaps, later use – my mom’s umbrella, extra floor tile from Jon and Will’s bathroom, a never used “Swiffer”, and this, a little hourglass. This was for Elizabeth when she was learning to brush her teeth, something visual and literal to tell her how long to brush. I don’t know why it ended up in the broom closet, but it did and now what? What should be its future? Life can be so turbulent and messy and it can hurt sometimes, but then you find a remnant from the past that forces you to recall a happy moment, a tender moment from childhood and for a minute you reach back, you escape, and remember something sweet and with this memory you feel good and go on. So, does that stir of positive emotion validate all of the things I have stored in my attic? That concept completely denies me the ability to “lighten up”. It keeps me in the past and clutters my emotional and physical space – this is complicated. The memory that this little thing caused was so soothing for me - it represented a time of less complication and I remembered a little girl that I once had…I suppose the answer is moderation, but what do I do with this hourglass? “Create affirmations with these basic ingredients: They’re personal, positive, in present tense, visual and emotional. Then, each day, visualize the realization of these affirmations. You’ll find that your behavior and circumstances will change for the better”. Stephen Covey b u p s I have been introduced to The Power of the Myth this summer and it is compelling. I especially love the way Campbell explains religion in terms of metaphors and how we erroneously read life in prose instead of poetry.
 Joseph Campbell : This is an absolute necessity for anybody today. You must have a room, or a certain hour or so a day, where you don’t know what was in the newspapers that morning, you don’t know who your friends are, you don’t know what you owe anybody, you don’t know what anybody owes to you. This is a place where you can simply experience and bring forth what you are and what you might be, This is the place of creative incubation. At first you may find that nothing happens there. But if you have a sacred place and use it, something eventually will happen.
Lists, somewhat of a modern day plague. I somehow think these inventories are poisoning our drinking water. They have become measuring sticks and we are comparing ourselves and worse, our children, to these manufactured postings: top ten fastest, top ten most expensive, top ten Hollywood bodies, top ten luxury cars, top ten places to live, etc – who cares? It is becoming more and more difficult to find the space to think your own thoughts and not compare people; we are compromising our creativity with lists and we are damaging the self esteem of children. I hate when people say, “When I was a kid”, but I have to include this line to make my point; our world was “our world”, not a series of some illusive goals to attempt set by the media and mass marketing. Now we know what everyone is doing and society is having a field day posting these lists of who is doing it “best”. To add to this modern day muddle, most all of it is contrived – plastic surgery, enhancement drugs, Photoshop - but our kids, and, sadly, ourselves, are using this propaganda as our measuring sticks. I conclude my soapbox soliloquy with this quote by Steven Pressfield, “Our job in this lifetime is not to shape ourselves into some ideal we imagine we ought to be, but to find out who we already are and become it”. 
"What you are comes to you" “Once you make a decision, the universe conspires to make it happen.” “People do not seem to realize that their opinion of the world is also a confession of character.” Wrinkles will only go where the smiles have been.
Jimmy Buffett 
I read Walden years ago as a college student. I recently recommended it to my brother and in making the recommendation, I became interested in reading it again. I Goggled it and found Spark notes – something I was unable to do in 1976. I found the following explanation of a quote and I am tangling with it this morning. As in everything, it is defined by your purpose. I think traveling, at its best, is seeing how others live, liberating your views and finally going home with a broader scope and a new appreciation of your life. As Thoreau says, however, we can never expect traveling to distant shores to change our soul, for that we must travel inward, a journey that many of us fear and avoid. It is far easier to distract ourselves with trips and things.
“ It is not worth the while to go round the world to count the cats in Zanzibar”. . This statement from the “Conclusion” of Walden illustrates another debt on Thoreau’s part to the American Transcendentalist school of his philosophical mentor, Ralph Waldo Emerson. In Emerson’s influential essay “Self-Reliance,” which Thoreau’s Walden project could be said to put into practice, Emerson makes the assertion that “travel is a fool’s paradise,” and that it is far more useful to change one’s soul than to change one’s landscape. The fool who thinks that his life will change on a trip to Europe is shocked and disappointed to discover, after unpacking his suitcase on arrival, that he is still in the same tedious company of himself. For Emerson the futility of travel is simply a consequence of his belief in the centrality of the self—the depth and health of the soul—in all human affairs. Thoreau inherits this same belief, downgrading the usual glamour of international travel (in this case to Zanzibar, off the coast of East Africa) with the ridiculous enterprise of counting felines. The point of this mockery is to point to a better alternative to African voyages. As he intimates earlier when he ironically notes that he has traveled a lot in Concord, Thoreau insists that the most valuable kind of travel occurs without leaving one’s hometown: the inward voyage of soul-searching.(spark notes) b u p s
I have learned this, at least, by my experiment;
that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.
-Henry David Thoreau
I look at the old photos one way, a modern way with astute eyes that know about technology and the way it enhances reality, and I am disappointed, but then I look at them with my heart and I am joyous. I love the old shots that captured a day when I had my parents and Christmas was filled with Castle Grayskull , Fisher Price, Tinkertoys , big red firetrucks, cookies for Santa, and sleeping children with sweet dreams. Those photos are old and the resolution is not good, but the memories they cause are crisp and incredible. Time has erased all of the troubles that may have surrounded those long ago moments and leaves only an image of comfort and tenderness as I look at the young faces and try to find some lingering and forgotten memory hiding in the blurry background, something that might pull me in even closer. Curiously, I think of the snapshots of this present life that will one day hide the bits of tenderness and confusion that are here with me now and they will remind me of these days that are seemingly brimming with joy represented in the young faces and the crisp and revealing backgrounds. Either way, the end result is soothing or poignant , looking back, to remember those days that have gently and swiftly carried you to these days. So, I end this rambling and this prodding of the past with a thought that has become cliché, but is, nevertheless, “timeless”: “Time goes by so fast, people go in and out of your life. You must never miss the opportunity to tell these people how much they mean to you.” stumbled across this today and I had to share. The most exhausting thing you can do is to be inauthentic.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh
The 4th of July… I love the images it conjures especially the connotation of independence. (I do not, however, like the calories it offers. I ate way too much blackberry cobbler. I will eat less today…) I ended the day yesterday on the lawnmower; it was a great place to sit down to rest. Anyway, I had time to reflect and think about how hard it is to make life simple, how to be independent of so many things. It truly is much easier to make life complicated. Complications cause distractions and when we are distracted, we do not have to internalize and sometimes internalizing is uncomfortable, so… let’s just do something instead. Society and propaganda make complication and conundrums so readily available and that is where the money is. There is little, if any, profit in simplicity. There is nothing (monetary) to gain in simplicity; therefore it is, for the most part, just a trendy catch phrase to toss around. I understand how difficult it is to implement, I am also a brainwashed consumer. I continue to take issue with it and rebel against it and continue to strive to achieve some level of simplicity in my life. The most obvious and easiest place to begin is with possessions – the whole “declutter” concept is posted on the cover of every ladies' magazine. I , too, will begin with this and will, hopefully, achieve a far superior podium. I have posted a picture of yesterday afternoon, Bar B Que, crepe myrtles, market umbrellas, live oaks, South Louisiana humidity, ... It is the kind of picture that can jumpstart your imagination and perhaps cause a bit of an internal journey to begin. 
When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.
Wayne Dyer b u 
It’s just all a myriad of colors and sounds and smells, Key West and South Beach. The energy of Miami Beach is unlike my small sleepy town and the sounds from the ocean are there always in the back ground reminding you of a greater force. I think Key West was my favorite spot; the looseness was so comforting and the ability to feel “you” was so freeing. There seems to be no socioeconomic rules on the island; you are welcome there and celebrated for just being. How did it get so messed up? I ask, why did we complicate our lives, for what, for things? The refreshing ocean breeze, the vibrant Poinciana trees, the spirited sounds, the vibrant canvases, the sunsets, the hens and chicks, ahhhh Key West… My mother said to me, "If you are a soldier, you will become a general. If you are a monk, you will become the Pope." Instead, I was a painter, and became Picasso.
Pablo Picasso June 29, 2010 reality 
just to say, the hot pink luggage was a gift from my parents when I graduated from high school in 1972. This luggage traveled through Europe with me and each and every place I ventured in my youth, filled with halter tops, flip flops, and dreams. Elizabeth discovered it in the attic and fell in love with it and has reclaimed it and it is now her "vintage" luggage filled with halter tops, flip flops, and dreams that sits at the door and screams "adventure". b u
b u p s We are here in Key West and I am loving the island life. Just went to Hemingway’s house and feel inspired. On the way back to our hotel, I saw one of the many roosters and chickens here on the island - a Cuban influence that will cost a person $500 if they harm one of these feathered friends. I love that value placed on these birds. I love alot of things here. I love the art and the total absence of pretence. 
Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.
-- Grace Hansen b u p s
For some unknown reason I was thinking about childhood and swings. Maybe it was the green dragonfly that sat on my clothesline while I hung out my sheets, or maybe it was the four o’clocks that open in the late afternoon when the heat lifted just a bit, or perhaps it was the sliver of the new moon hanging in the summer sky just below Venus. I don’t know, but all of my senses say summer and summer reminds me of childhood and childhood reminds me of swings. I can remember so vividly swinging on the playground swing set in first grade. When the recess bell rang, I would run to the playground to “get a swing”. It was a freeing experience, a disconnect. I would swing and sing. One of the songs I sang was “Oh Little Playmate”. Because of the “wonder” of the World Wide Web, I have found the lyrics: Oh little playmate Come out and play with me And bring your dollies three Climb up my apple tree Slide down my rain barrel Into my cellar door And we'll be jolly friends Forever more more I'm sorry playmate I cannot play with you My dolly's got the flu Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo hoo 'Ain't got no rain barrel 'Ain't got no cellar door But we'll be jolly friends Forever more
Anyway, thinking about those days in the clouds made me think of swing sets and how they have changed, a change that parallels childhood, I think. $31 - $52 so I ask, what kid had more fun? b u p s I found this nostalgic article with a contemporary message by Tom Hughes and wanted to post it. The Foodways of a 50's Childhood "It seems remarkable to think about it now, but I went home for lunch until high school. I dashed home on my bike, about four blocks, sat down with my Mom and ate lunch at the kitchen table. We discussed our mornings. I played with my dog a few minutes and then biked back to play with friends in the schoolyard. Some students brought lunch but not many. Those were the days most moms were homemakers. I didn't encounter a school cafeteria until I was in 9th grade. Another strong memory of growing up in the 50's was how almost every family had a vegetable garden in the backyard. These were habits formed by wartime victory garden necessity. We would all pour over the seed catalogs that piled up in winter. Parts of every weekend were dedicated to working in the garden with my Dad. My family, like most families I knew, always sat down for meals together, including breakfast. We were expected to be on time, help serve, clear and clean up. We were also expected to participate in the conversation. Sunday midday dinner was served in the dining room. We wore our best clothes and used the best china.We all ate the same food, no special menus or diets were considered. We certainly were expected to "clean our plates" and if we balked the "starving Armenians, or Chinese children" were quickly mentioned. Many of my fondest childhood memories are food related....my parents canning surplus fruits and vegetables, for instance. I loved watching their assembly line. Later they put a big freezer in the basement and froze their excess garden harvest, as well as buying and freezing meat fresh from wholesalers. No wonder I had so many friends--my parents kept a steady supply of popsicles and ice cream sandwiches which were freely distributed. I can remember enjoying watching my parents cook up huge pots of vegetable soup, Saturday night feasts of "corned beef and cabbage," my Dad sharpening his carving knives for baked hams, and roast beef. My mom grew up on a dairy farm and my dad was a city fellow who enjoyed eating. Once a month or so we went out for dinner. We dressed for this occasion as well. On Tuesdays, my dad was usually away on business and my Mom took the night off from cooking and we all went to Yvonne's Diner for dinner. Yvonne's menu featured the same things we ate at home. It was all cooked from fresh ingredients and not at all fast. I can't remember ever having Chinese take-out, eating pizza or any other ethnic food until I was away at college. The type of food my family cooked or ordered out, I guess, could be identified as standard American/British. Meat, potatoes, a green veg, dinner rolls, salad and dessert. Once in a while I got my mom to prepare my favorite---"Spanish rice." This was the most ethnic we ever got. It was pork chops cooked in stewed tomatoes, bell peppers, onion, sugar and some spices poured over rice. The only time we did not have potatoes with a meal was this one dish with rice. We ate out of our garden from spring to the middle of fall. But we still made regular trips to the farm stands on the edge of town for fried green tomato orgies and, of course, sweet corn. My Dad ate prodigious amounts of corn on the cob and he said we didn't need to bother growing it in our garden. We also ate corn chowder, corn fritters, corn pudding and corn a dozen other ways. In peach season we sat with our neighbors out on the porch and took turns cranking our own ice cream.We also had fresh strawberry ice cream and later in the summer, blueberry. A big deal in high school once we all got driving licenses was to drive out of town to the highway and hang out at a place called Gino's Hamburgers. We would buy a bag of silver dollar sized mini hamburgers and a separate bag of fries, all washed down with strawberry milkshakes. We watched as these meals were assembly-line mass produced and passed through a window. We would go back and lean on our cars to eat. Little did any of us know that we were experiencing the birth of the fast food revolution. In my junior year I lived with an Italian family in Florence, Italy. It was altogether familiar to me that they too, sat down for every meal as a family. Everyone came home from work or school at midday for lunch and a rest. I had developed the hamburger habit, nevertheless, and a big treat to assuage my homesickness was tracking down hamburgers in Milan and Rome. A lot has changed about how America families eat over this past quarter century. Now in most families, both parents work, kids are required to eat lunch at school, few people have the time or energy to tend much of a vegetable garden; eating out is common, ethnic restaurants and fast food outlets are everywhere, people don't need to know how to cook to feed themselves as packaged convenience foods and microwaves cater to everyone's tastes and habits. Kids spend their time riding in or pushing a grocery shopping cart, not tending the family garden. What hasn't changed is that early experiences with food imprints habits and tastes that extend into adulthood. Kids who eat well, participate in gardening, cooking and sharing meals with family and friends are more likely to continue these habits as adults with their own families, as my wife and I have done. Now after several decades of eating conveniently and fast, an alarming percentage of two generations are seriously overweight and out of touch with their food. Reformers feel the only alternative is to reconnect children at the earliest age possible with food experiences in school settings that were once a universal feature of family life. " 
b u p s
The list of summer vegetables and fruit is growing and with it, my happiness. Today I picked a few plums (1st time ever), zucchini, squash, cucumbers, a few strawberries, and 8 eggs. I also shucked 3 dozen ears of corn I bought from a neighbor. It is the depiction of summer and so fulfilling to be involved with your food. We keep getting farther and farther away, however. Having a garden is not something reasonable for most, but the Farmer’s Market is a great place to go. Because of the chemicals used on commercially grown food and the distance it travels, there remains little nutrition. Here is a quick list from Dr. Weil of 11 foods you do not have to buy organic:
I have posted this before, but while I am on the subject (my soapbox) I will post the list of the “Dirty Dozen”, the most chemically treated foods, foods you should buy organic : 
b healthy
p s
June 9, 2010
I remember the day, the moment my dad died, the day everything changed. He was the only remaining parent, he was there at the head of the family, someone, regardless of how feeble or sick, who was the pinnacle and we, the children, were in subsequent and safe positions. In that instant, he was gone, our cushion and protection was gone and we moved up. It was life in slow motion, it was life changing. I remember those moments before. I remember there were these “angels” in our parent’s house, ladies from Hospice who did not even know us but they were there catching our tears and taking care of the ugly “business” of death. I cannot tell you the names of these “angels”, but I know they were called on a moment’s notice and they graciously walked out of their lives and into ours. Amongst the agony of grief, I remember noticing their generosity, their kind spirit, and making note that I wanted to be in that wonderful world of theirs. Well, today is the day, today I have finally made a bit of room in my busy life to be an anonymous angel. I called S.N.A.P. (safety net for abused persons) and I will visit today. I am so happy. The coordinator thanked me; imagine that; she thanked me when I am so thankful I can help. I do not know where this will go, but I will let you know. Anything that involves helping abused children has to be the most noble of all causes. Thank you to the faceless “angels” that were there for me and my family; you have inspired me. b u p s
Some days, like yesterday, I think I will give up the garden and visit the farmers market more often. I think I will leave all of the work behind and instead buy from those who do it so well. I think this when I am finding ways to scale down and simplify – the catch phrase of the decade – I think about having more time to stop and rest, but then I go outside the next morning the rains have stopped the sun is shining and my garden is so beautiful and giving. I pick a few cucumbers to go with lunch and a zucchini to make a dessert bread and a small bunch of zinnias for color. There are herbs for sauces and squashes and peppers and melon vines with promise and all of my sense has banished, once again. "We come from the earth, we return to the earth, and in between we garden." 
b u p s The day is ahead waiting for me like an empty canvas; I hope I do something beautiful with it. I hope I make a difference ... b u p s 
It is storming outside, dark and rumbling, kind of what I am feeling, kind of, not totally. I feel “rumbly”, not dark. I get this way when I have time, time to stop and think.I realize that my job keeps me from looking inward, it keeps me “busy” and occupied and that time to turn in and reflect is replaced with tiredness and distraction. Well, on this third day of June within the silence of my house I do think about things, a lot of things. I find my first thoughts go towards the lives of my children, I go down the list and think of each one and I am happy they are all healthy and unique am thankful for so many things in regards to them but one thing that quickly surfaces for me is their ability to be their own people – they are not swayed by trends and propaganda, they are genuine and free and for that I am so thankful. Next, I think of my art and it is here where I feel frustration. I am not anywhere where I want to be right now. I know that, like any problem, I must face it head on and not ponder but just “do”. I have four canvases started and today, this stormy day, I plan to sit there in front of my easel near the window and “do” art. I hope that by the end of the day I have reached a more satisfactory point. Some days I feel so inept and some days I feel quiet able. The third thing this stillness makes me think of is all of this “stuff” and how I have a love hate relationship with it. I do not own much in terms of monetary value, but I possess my past in terms of sentimental attachment. I look at this as a weakness most days but then on some days I look at this as a connection to what was. To say I struggle with this would be accurate. I have lost both of my parents and all of my grandparents; I know how the story ends; I know where all of this “stuff” ends up. I have to lighten this load; it is going to immobilize me at some point. “A man is rich in proportion to the number of things he can afford to let alone."
— Henry David Thoreau (Walden) The cost of a thing is that amount of life which must be exchanged for it.
Henry David Thoreau
b u p s 
I have given up cooking full meals. Instead I put out a sort of fresh food bar in late morning and it is there to graze on all afternoon. We are all “watching our weight” and I am always trying to shove fresh and organic food down their throats so, except for not having a “sit down” meal, this is good for us. I am having fun with it because it reminds me of laying out my palette with the colors of Nature in place of paints. Yesterday I did use the stove to sauté garlic, onions, and peppers in extra virgin olive oil to which I added four cans of organic black beans to simmer and serve over organic brown rice. I opened one of my few remaining jars of chow chow and sliced a cucumber from the garden. Yum. I also put out little bowls of broccoli, spinach, cranberries, and walnuts to make a side salad with. I boiled six eggs from our hens and peeled and salt and peppered them to use for the salad or just to eat as is. I made a pitcher of green tea with slices of orange and that was the “spread”. I had very little to put away yesterday evening. I already have my table scape planned for today. I noticed yesterday that I had a fat zucchini in the garden just right for two loaves of zucchini bread. I also have several yellow squashes ready to be picked and sautéed with onions and peppers. I will cut a fresh pineapple and cantaloupe to lay out on the cutting board and make another pitcher of green tea. No one ate the eggs from yesterday so I will add to them and put them out with salt and pepper for a protein source. I expect to find more cucumbers in the garden and a few cherry tomatoes so I will slice a couple to sit in salt, pepper, and white vinegar with the bite sized tomatoes. I always cook more rice than we eat so I will make a pilaf with what is left over, I will probably use onions, butter, sweet peas and peppers. Done…now I can paint! It is that time of day when I want to be inside and outside; I always struggle with wanting to watch the moon take its place in the summer sky or inside putting the day away in the kitchen and listening to the final spin of the laundry room as I turn off the light. A sort of ritual that says “day is done” and time to become part of the lazy evening that assures me everything can wait until tomorrow and I release the day - “One day at a time--this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past for it is gone; and do not be troubled about the future, for it has not yet come…” I know this and I believe this and I have been told this by my mother many times, but it is challenging at times to abide. It is funny how our heads and our hearts are constantly at battle and hardly ever as one. I don’t know why it happens that way; I feel confident it is by design; I just don’t understand. I think of how different my life would be if I made all of my decisions intellectually. I suppose I would be “in a good place”, but I am not certain I would feel happiness. Whereas, I think of how my life would be if all of my decisions were emotionally based, I am not sure where I would be. But I think I might be “wobbly”. I guess I have just answered my own question; we need a “balance”. Finding balance causes contentedness. That is the word of the day for me, “balance” - a state in which various parts form a satisfying and harmonious whole and nothing is out of proportion or unduly emphasized at the expense of the rest.  Ahh summer. I saw a green dragonfly in my garden yesterday and a tiny ribbon snake finding its way into the underbrush .My gardenia bush is exploding with the fragrance that whispers summer and there is a line for the birdbath. I picked my first zucchini yesterday and turned it into three loaves of zucchini bread and I will gather more dew berries today, collecting enough to make a cobbler next Sunday. My daughter proposed we only eat from the garden this season. I suppose she has an immature interpretation of my garden, but the idea is pleasing. I plan to make fewer trips to the grocery store this season of squash and cucumbers and tomatoes and prepare more in my kitchen from my garden. My cousin sent a recipe for vegetarian lasagna made with zucchini that I am anxious to try (it will follow this post) and I cannot wait to dig up potatoes early in June. It is all so visual and wonderful. I truly cannot imagine a year without a garden. I love the changing of the seasons and it seems I never am disappointed with the dramatic delivery and the feelings of renewal they rouse. "I used to visit and revisit it a dozen times a day, and stand in deep contemplation over my vegetable progeny with a love that nobody could share or conceive of who had never taken part in the process of creation. It was one of the most bewitching sights in the world to observe a hill of beans thrusting aside the soil, or a rose of early peas just peeping forth sufficiently to trace a line of delicate green".
Nathaniel Hawthorne, Mosses from an Old Manse Glenda's Zucchini Lasagna 1 medium onion chopped
1 clove garlic finely chopped 1t olive oil
1 15 oz can tomato sauce
1t oregano
dash pepper
2c low fat cottage cheese
1/2c parmesan
1 egg
3 medium zucchini
2t flour
1c shredded mozzarella
1. Saute onion and garlic in oil for two minutes. Stir in tomato sauce, oregano and pepper. Bring to boiling. Simmer uncovered 20 minutes until thickened.
2.Combine cottage cheese, parmesan and egg in blender. Whirl until smooth.
3. Spray baking dish with nonstick vegetable/olive oil cooking spray.
4. Slice zucchini lengthwise into 1/4" thick strips. Layer half in dish. Sprinkle with flour (I've found you need more flour than called for or it gets pretty soupy). Spread with half each of the cheese mixture, tomato sauce, and mozzarella. Repeat layers.
5. Bake in preheated 350degree oven for 40 minutes or until tender. Let stand 15 minutes.....STANDING IS REQUIRED or (again) it's soupy.
b u ps  "There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be..."
— John Lennon
"Time you enjoy wasting, was not wasted."
— John Lennon "Our society is run by insane people for insane objectives"
— John Lennon "You don't need anybody to tell you who you are or what you are.
You are what you are."
John Lennon
Another milestone has been met this past week end, graduation. It was a great experience. I expected stuffiness and pomp but instead, we were entertained in a way that can only happen “way down yonder in New Orleans”. The graduates were given white flag – like pieces of fabric that they waved to the rhythm of the orchestra when they played jazz numbers and again when the Superdome exploded with thunder as we watched on big screens the New Orleans Saints score the touchdown that made them national champions and Louisiana’s inspiration.It was refreshing to see the complimentary mix of academia and athletics. Like I said, I would have expected solemnity and ceremony from this southern university, but I did not factor in that it happened to be in New Orleans. As the nightmare unfolds in the Gulf, we escaped for a day and celebrated our future. I came across something I wrote four years ago about mothers, mine specifically, and I want to post - I can never say enough good about my mom. Today, we remember Mothers as some of the world’s most cherished, irreplaceable people. If I had only one word to describe a mother’s love, it would be transcendental. Powerful forces like disagreements, distance and death try to erode it, but cannot. A mother and her child are eternal. Regardless of the years, I can still feel my mother’s hand touching my hot forehead with the back of her hand when I was sick and fastening my ponytail tight and perfectly, the way only she could, when I was ten and I can still remember her voice and the convincing way it sounded when she told me,“It will all work out”.She had a way of putting my world right side up for me. I think of her each day and miss her more and more. In the whole world, there isn’t any one who can take her place – mothers are custom made for their children. We will forget many people in our lives, but we will never forget our mothers. They are the first to love us. When I had my first baby, my mother told me, “…from the time he draws his first breath, until you draw your last, he will never leave your mind.” She was right………about everything. 
These are sweetheart roses my mom showed up one day with about 25 years ago for my new house trailing on a fence my twins made for me. May 9, 2010 One generation plants the trees; another gets the shade. Jewish proverb
God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers.
Maureen Hawkins: Before you were conceived I wanted you
Before you were born I loved you
Before you were here an hour I would die for you
This is the miracle of life.
xo ps 
I aspire to be this positive towards this day: A U.S. Marine patrols with an opium poppy flower on his helmet on March 19, 2009 near Baqwa in Farah province of southwest Afghanistan. The Marines based at the remote village are battling a Taliban insurgency funded in large part from the multi-billion dollar drug export trade thriving in the south of the country. (John Moore/Getty Images) 
I have to get on a soapbox; the spill in the Gulf and the threats to our coast has, of course, affected me. I cannot “do” anything about it so I turn to my keyboard and do all that I can, write about it. For me it is all about our unyielding, insatiable desire to consume – bigger cars, bigger houses, more stuff. We do all of this at the expense of our wildlife and our land. We sure have come a long way from being good stewards of the Earth. I live in a house that is too big and I went through nearly a decade of consumerism where I got sucked into that revolting world and I am so ashamed of myself for losing sight of who I was and submitting to the propaganda. I am back to where I was, the way I was raised, and I am wishing I had never gone “there”, but I can only learn and go forward. Anyway, I have connected to this site and the information, I think, is worth reading and absorbing, I have pulled a bit of it and posted it. http://www.verdant.net/society.htm "You work in a job you hate, to buy stuff that you don't need, to impress people that you don't like." - Unknown "He who dies with the most toys wins" "Pro-sports contribute next-to-nothing to communities economically yet they are sucking public dollars that could be better spent on parks, schools and public services into millionaires/billionaire's pockets and deluding a whole generation of at-risk youth into believing in the possibility of an "athletic career". "
"Happiness can't be purchased in the marketplace, no matter how much advertising tries to convince you of it. Market driven forces have usurped the role once assumed by family, home, common-sense and community. We have been programmed to believe that we should pursue more money to spend on more things offered in the marketplace, to be living mannequins for the material adornments of the hour, our worth determined by what we have or don't have, rather than what we are, what we do or what we know. "
"Consumerism, already having captured death as a consumer obligation whereby sadness and regret are quenched by spending lots of money, now turns major life events like weddings and births into consumer events with their own hierarchy of demands for the things which assume a life of their own. For example, the bride's dress and accessories assumes far more significance in the telling than the bride's state of mind. Baby shower gifts take precedence over helping with the baby." "When people have lost their authentic personal taste, they lose their personality and become instruments of other people's wills." Robert Graves http://www.ranken-energy.com/Products%20from%20Petroleum.htm A partial list of products made from Petroleum (144 of 6000 items)
One 42-gallon barrel of oil creates 19.4 gallons of gasoline. The rest (over half) is used to make things like:
Solvents | Diesel fuel | Motor Oil | Bearing Grease | Ink | Floor Wax | Ballpoint Pens | Football Cleats | Upholstery | Sweaters | Boats | Insecticides | Bicycle Tires | Sports Car Bodies | Nail Polish | Fishing lures | Dresses | Tires | Golf Bags | Perfumes | Cassettes | Dishwasher parts | Tool Boxes | Shoe Polish | Motorcycle Helmet | Caulking | Petroleum Jelly | Transparent Tape | CD Player | Faucet Washers | Antiseptics | Clothesline | Curtains | Food Preservatives | Basketballs | Soap | Vitamin Capsules | Antihistamines | Purses | Shoes | Dashboards | Cortisone | Deodorant | Footballs | Putty | Dyes | Panty Hose | Refrigerant | Percolators | Life Jackets | Rubbing Alcohol | Linings | Skis | TV Cabinets | Shag Rugs | Electrician's Tape | Tool Racks | Car Battery Cases | Epoxy | Paint | Mops | Slacks | Insect Repellent | Oil Filters | Umbrellas | Yarn | Fertilizers | Hair Coloring | Roofing | Toilet Seats | Fishing Rods | Lipstick | Denture Adhesive | Linoleum | Ice Cube Trays | Synthetic Rubber | Speakers | Plastic Wood | Electric Blankets | Glycerin | Tennis Rackets | Rubber Cement | Fishing Boots | Dice | Nylon Rope | Candles | Trash Bags | House Paint | Water Pipes | Hand Lotion | Roller Skates | Surf Boards | Shampoo | Wheels | Paint Rollers | Shower Curtains | Guitar Strings | Luggage | Aspirin | Safety Glasses | Antifreeze | Football Helmets | Awnings | Eyeglasses | Clothes | Toothbrushes | Ice Chests | Footballs | Combs | CD's & DVD's | Paint Brushes | Detergents | Vaporizers | Balloons | Sun Glasses | Tents | Heart Valves | Crayons | Parachutes | Telephones | Enamel | Pillows | Dishes | Cameras | Anesthetics | Artificial Turf | Artificial limbs | Bandages | Dentures | Model Cars | Folding Doors | Hair Curlers | Cold cream | Movie film | Soft Contact lenses | Drinking Cups | Fan Belts | Car Enamel | Shaving Cream | Ammonia | Refrigerators | Golf Balls | Toothpaste | Gasoline |
Americans consume petroleum products at a rate of three-and-a-half gallons of oil and more than
250 cubic feet of natural gas per day each! But, as shown here petroleum is not just used for fuel. The following is an sobering excerpt from an article from the AP by Doyle Rice
"Some of the birds most affected include ducks, geese, as well as hundreds of species of migrating songbirds, which use this ecosystem as part of their journey on their way back from South America. As well, shorebirds such as cranes, gulls, and the brown pelican are also at risk. "It's not a pretty picture," says Kaderka. As for marine mammals, Kaderka reports that the spill threatens dolphins, whales, and sea turtles, since they all have to come up to the surface to breathe."It is of grave concern," says David Kennedy of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration about the spill. "I am frightened. This is a very, very big thing. And the efforts that are going to be required to do anything about it, especially if it continues on, are just mind-boggling."
So I ask, is all of this heartache worth our over consumption??? I am sick with all of this. Why do we have to continue to destroy animal habitat? Do we really need more malls and bigger cars and houses? I don’t understand where the animals will go? Perhaps the government will put them on the reservations with the Indians? I see it here in a town near my small town – sprawl, more and more franchises consuming pastures and forest. Okay, I have said enough. I am beginning to write with pure, raw emotion and not much intellect. There are two ways to get enough: one is to continue to accumulate more and more. The other is to desire less. -G.K. Chesterton (1874-1936) One of the weaknesses of our age is inability to distinguish needs from greeds. -Don Robinson Thinking to get at once all the gold the goose could give, he killed it and opened it only to find—nothing. -Aesop (c. B.C. 555) This drive to always want more is based on the misconceptions that having more will make me more happy, more important, and more secure, but all three ideas are untrue. Possessions only provide temporary happiness. Because things do not change, we eventually become bored with them and then want newer, bigger, better versions. -Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life, 2002 The reality is that our economy now consists of driving 250 million vehicles around the suburbs and malls and eating fried chicken. We don’t manufacture much. We just burn up ever scarcer petroleum in the ever-expanding suburbs built with mortgage money lent to people who haven’t a clue. -Joe Bageant, Deer Hunting With Jesus, 2007 Give the public the 'image' of what it thinks it ought to be, or what television commercials or glossy magazine ads have convinced us we ought to be, and we will buy more of the product, become closer to the image, and further from reality. Madeline L'Engle (1918-2007), A Circle of Quiet, 1972 Everything in excess is opposed to nature. -Hippocrates (B.C. 460-370) Plant a garden…  My daughter shared this with me today and I had to share with you... “God touches us to initiate a divine game of tag.” 
b u p.s. I just wanted to post this shot from yesterday evening. I discovered my first magnolia up against the waxing moonlit sky - Just a little gift from above - hope you "got it". b u p.s. 
Well, Earth Day is over. That means , for alot of people, you can go back to doing what you do the other 364 days of the year. JJ I don't want to get into the political issues of global warming and all the fanfare that comes with it; I just know that being a good steward of the earth is the right thing to do - it really is that simple to me. We are born with nothing and we leave with nothing, we leave this planet to our children. We leave our attitude towards it also. I grew up in the 60s and my mother grew up in the Great Depression - I witnessed conservation and respect for all that you had. I remember once, her rescuing a partial slice of bread from the kitchen trash to feed the birds - no waste, "you don't throw food away". I can draw up that image so clearly and it continues to speak volumes to me and prevents me from ever throwing out food - I compost and have chickens. Anyway, that is how I grew up and consequently, that is what I learned. It seems many people just are on this bandwagon for the coolness of it or so that they can buy all of the cool green "stuff”. It is way beyond all of that, it is my mom rescuing a piece of bread for the birds and Miss Sue saving seeds and watering her garden with a tin can; it is about attitude and respect, not fanfare and bumper stickers. b u,
A friend (and really cool person) posted this daily zen on her Facebook wall today and I wanted to share it with you: "Do not overrate what you have received, nor envy others. He who envies others does not obtain peace of mind". 
The second part of this message is really good advice, but it is the first sentence that I love. I love to not overrate – so much pressure disappears. While I have great appreciation and respect for hard work and achievement, I am not comfortable with overrating anyone. Anyway, this is something I thought worth posting. Pride comes before a fall Proverb 
b u, p.s. April 11, 2010 To see, really see, green you must see spring. I cannot seem to come inside during these near perfect southern days; the outside is so alluring and I am so pathetically weak. I mean, who really cares if the laundry is not folded; you can easily find what you need in the heap on the floor – it is all clean. And what if the dishes are not put away; there are several plates and cups in the dish drain, easily accessible and squeaky clean. I have to be in my garden now, for summer’s heat will soon enough roll in and I will be inside escaping it. I look at the pear trees and think of late July when the twins were in high school and loaded up on pears to take to the lake. I look at the blackberry bushes and I see my kids when they were small filling little buckets of berries and I would bake cobblers in the afternoon when the day broke and we came inside to rest. I see the honeysuckle vines sprawling on fences and in the woods, soon it will be May and the night air will be sweet from their fragrance and I will know school is nearly over. These days are fleeting and I must capture all that I can. My cousin, Glenda, sent me something that is the essence of this feeling, a poem by Louise Erdrich.
"Advice to myself."
"Leave the dishes.
Let the celery rot in the bottom drawer of the refrigerator
and earthen scum harden on the kitchen floor.
Leave the black crumbs at the bottom of the toaster.
Throw the cracked bowl out and don't patch the cup.
Don't patch anything. Don't mend. Buy safety pins.
Don't even sew in a button.
Let the wind have its way, then the earth
that invades as dust and then the dead
foaming up in gray rolls under the couch.
Talk to them. Tell them they are welcome.
Don't keep all the pieces of the puzzle
or the doll's tiny shoes, don't worry
who uses whose toothbrush or if anything
matches, at all.
Except one word to another. Or a thought.
Pursue the authentic.
Go after it with all your heart.
Your heart, that place
you don't even think of cleaning out.
That closet stuffed with savage mementoes.
Don't sort the paperclips from screws from saved baby teeth
or worry if we're all eating cereal for dinner
again. Don't answer the telephone, ever,
or weep over anything that breaks.
Pink molds will grow within those sealed cartons
in the refrigerator. Accept new forms of life
and talk to the dead
who drift in through the screened windows, who collect
patiently on tops of food jars and books.
Recycle the mail, don't read it, don't read anything
except what destroys
the insulation between yourself and your experience."
 Go outside and plant a packet of seeds, embrace the season and...
I wake my daughter up twice every school morning, once to transition and then again about fifteen minutes later to actually connect feet to floor.This morning, I found this little bit of art work on her wall over her bed, something she did before falling asleep last night. These simple words have caused a commotion in my day, a pleasant one, and I wanted to share.I have been blessed with the most perfect daughter for me :). She is challenging, but her pure and simple outlook on life and liberal interpretation of people has taken me to the next level. Anyway, just wanted to get you thinking on this Wednesday.  I truly cannot get enough of this season. I am turning dirt over everywhere I can and planting seeds and plants and tubers and trees and bushes. I am in awe of the beauty of these early spring days and I have expanded my garden to contain all of my “ambition”. I know by June, it will all be disheveled, but “till” (love the pun) then, I am going to enjoy the anticipation.
There are many things about this state of affairs that bother me. While I appreciate hundreds of the modern offerings of our society , I am bothered by the way we have disconnected from our food sources. How can we possibly be healthy when we eat our meals from a box? I have this dream of eating only what my garden and my chickens produce for a bit of time this summer. I will have to be creative with my culinary skills and convincing with my family, but I aim to try it. I have so far, planted potatoes, green beans, tomatoes, various peppers, eggplant, strawberries, lettuces, cucumbers, zucchini, yellow squash, white scallop squash, cantaloupe, and watermelon!! I am very ambitious I think that no matter how old or infirm I may become, I will always plant a large garden in the spring. Who can resist the feelings of hope and joy that one gets from participating in nature's rebirth? plant something, p.s. Poll parrot shoes, white patent leather purses with a small St. Joseph missal and a rosary inside, baby chicks, my sister and I’s matching lavender Easter dresses that my grandmother made and my mother painstakingly ironed, springtime, flowers , just a myriad of Easters past, a place to go to remember and to feel warmth. Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama: This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness.
&
Responsibility does not only lie with the leaders of our countries or with those who have been appointed or elected to do a particular job. It lies with each of us individually. Peace, for example, starts within each one of us. When we have inner peace, we can be at peace with those around us.
 I remember being fascinated with the way I could find anything at my mom and dad’s house on Live Oak Lane. If one of my kids needed some obscurity for school or if I was on the hunt for a relic from the past, somewhere, in some drawer or closet, I could find “it”. That’s what happens to a house when you have lived there for so long; it accumulates and it stores memories, literally and figuratively. Well, I am there. I have moved up the domestic ladder and I think you can find anything here at my house. I never imagined it to happen here because, unlike my mother, I do, on occasion, declutter. I am beginning to object all of this propaganda to declutter and simplify your space, why not keep the memories stuffed in little corners and in cardboard boxes and under beds. Who cares? I think I will stop listening, if only peripherally, to the “next big thing” and keep all I want to keep. When someone needs some obscurity, I will be able to produce it, just as my mom and dad did. My one and only cousin “on my dad’s side” sent a quote to me yesterday – "A lie is a lie even if everyone believes it. The truth is the truth even if no one believes it”. So true, and yet another layer to this truism is ,“just because everyone is doing it doesn’t make it right”. I find comfort in clutter, no matter what “everyone” says.
b u, p.s. :) Og Mandino I found this on Facebook this morning and because I don't believe life to be accidental; I felt I should post this because perhaps someone needs this message today. Thanks Vince - you have the heart and words of an artist. p.s. Vincent P. Barras Ever feel the wheels of your life racing faster and faster as you speed past the people you love? Could you use a reminder on how to slow it all down? Take today to do two things: find someone that irritates you--and sometimes they are legion--and do something kind for him/her; and tell one person what they mean to you. It will make life a little more tender and precious. 
Whenever two people meet, there are really six people present. There is each man as he sees himself, each man as the other person sees him, and each man as he really is. William James Okay, how haunting is this? I remember being a kid and recording my voice on a little tape recorder we had and when I listened to it, I did not recognize it as my voice. I sounded different than I thought. That moment really impacted me and my perception of myself. William James takes it a giant step more and proclaims that the way people perceive us is not the way we see ourselves and then questions whether we even see ourselves correctly. I am thinking of this and wondering how to combat this false perception. I think the arts are a great way to “express yourself”, that is, if you create from your heart. It is something to think about and make you understand the importance and value in the long term relationship. Thought provoking stuff… St. Patrick's Day is an enchanted time - a day to begin transforming winter's dreams into summer's magic. I began this blog to remind me to pay attention to the small things in life, the things that really matter most (to me). After a day like yesterday, I struggle to get there. It seems more and more difficult to find those little things because they are getting overshadowed by all of the big things. I am recommitting to my little piece of cyberspace and will search high and low to find those little things that are good and if you care to, you can follow along and perhaps even send an example. One of the nicest things that happened yesterday was that one of my pullets laid her first egg. Today, Elizabeth picked a bouquet of flowers for me. 
p.s. I could easily be irresponsible today and forget about everything but the newness of spring that is surrounding my house. I could do things that I only do in my head, like lay in clover and look up into the endless sky somewhere near my plum trees so that I could smell the fragrance of their blossoms and in the woods I would here the birds singing and every now and then, a little breeze would deliver the smell of my Kieffer Pear, filled with fragrant white flowers that promise fruit for the late summer. I know all of these words are so cliché’ and I know they are overused, but how else to you say this? It is as though all of your senses are able to participate in this annual phenomenon of the arrival of spring. 
“If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride more merry-go-rounds. I would pick more daisies.” | Nadine Stair |
till next time, Don't you just hate the way society puts us in "groups"? I especially hate it when it is done to children. The world is becoming so small and not giving us room to grow; instead we are told what the status quo is and by the time a kid hits preschool - they are classified. I am not sure why I am posting this, but I did. It is obviously something I feel strongly about. If I had it to do over, I would disconnect more from society in regards to my children. I am very satisfied with their strong sense of individuality and their comfort with "who they are", but it was tough pushing through all of the muck - the half truths and propagandas of society. Be you, p.s. 
March 9, 2010 Advice from The Old Farmer’s Almanac
"Do you know the group of mammals known as the "seven sleepers"? Yes, they are the ones who hibernate in the winter. The list includes raccoons, chipmunks, skunks, bears, bats, woodchucks, and jumping mice. Raccoons and skunks, however, aren't true hibernators. They will wake up and wander around if the weather happens to warm. But, if you see any of these others on the list out for a stroll, you can assume spring is here, or nearly so." 
till next time, p.s.  Winter is waning just as the Full Worm moon fades in the chilly sky, this Lenten Moon that is considered to be the last full Moon of winter. I am finding signs of spring beneath ever patch of rotting leaves, under each clay pot that I move from the garden, and within each scoop of soil I turn over. Life is quick there, moving swiftly, getting ready for the warmer air and the renewal of this frigid planet. Soon buds will be fat and ready to burst and early spring flowers will scent the crisp air and once again, we will feel renewed. The tasks at hand are colossal however; winter has made a big mess. I suppose it is nature’s little way of getting us outside working hard to shed some of the fat winter has put on us from our languid winter behaviors and too much comfort food. With that thought in mind, I welcome the toil. I spend each moment I can in my garden, me and my chickens. They have helped me so much in these late days of winter; they scratch for fat worms ascending from the cold depths of the dirt and while scratching for them, they uproot winter weeds – we are practicing sustainable agriculture! However, they are nondiscriminatory and will continue this scratch and peck rhythm when I put tomato plants in the ground; they will destroy my vegetable crops! I am not quite sure how I will handle this??? For now, however, we make a great team.
Your imagination is your preview of life's coming attractions. Source: Wisdom from World Religions: Pathways Toward Heaven on Earth
February 24, 2010 things I never want this blog to be about material possessions; that would be the antithesis of its purpose and our purpose, but I feel inclined to mention something about some fun “things” I have recently acquired that have made me happy in the superficial way that things can make you “happy”. It is a curious bunch of stuff, but hey, it works for me. I now have Bean Boots to keep my feet dry when I am in my garden, especially in the early spring when the ground is wet and still cold, a VW to drive that takes very little gasoline, and an iphone to stay connected; to essentially hold the world in my hands. I have to say, these three items help to make my life easier “to do”. bean boots for everyone!!! “One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is.” Erma Bombeck being silly p.s. February 23, 2010  Og Mandino February 20, 2010 small steps 
I spent some of the morning reading my new book. It is one of Og Mandino’s books, The Greatest Secret in the World. Interesting and inspirational. So far, this is my favorite collection of words: “Good habits are the key to all success. Bad habits are the unlocked door to failure.” This resonates with me because I believe life is cumulative, every little thing moves us in a certain direction. Just as every thought we think becomes part of our fabric, everything we do positions us on a course. I have told this to my kids – make good choices, each day, each moment will position you in a place to decide between and amongst certain things – choose the right one, no matter how seemingly small and unimportant. I think it really is simple, we just tend to clutter it up to where the edges are smeared and the choices become complicated. Overthinking. Anyway, I will focus on developing good habits, small ones that will add up to something good. I think more about Og Mandino’s analogy of the little “ant that can devour a tiger” – one little bite at a time – moving in the right direction. I feel empowered; I feel I can do what I want to do with a positive attitude and persistence – “stick to itness”. I am in need of some sunshine and warm weather. I need to be in my garden planting seeds and fussing at my chickens. Spring officially arrives on March 20, about 1 month from today. I took a walk around today and found plum blossoms, a new assortment of birds, a bluer sky, and a promise of spring stirring in the wind. I am setting goals today – lofty goals that I will achieve, one small step at a time. 
a plum tree from my sister silver bells from my mom's yard till next time p.s. February 17, 2010 Mardi Gras  Just back from Fat Tuesday in New Orleans. Let me begin by saying – I hate crowds. This was okay, however. The positive energy still hovers over the city that the Saints resuscitated and really everyone was so nice. I am so happy to see New Orleans on the road to recovery. I love New Orleans. I suppose a lot of my emotions stem from my mother’s love for it. It is a unique city with some of our country’s deepest history and now, it is the home of the National Champions.
Later p.s. Oh, one more thing; I am driving a VW now and it needed a couple of bumper stickers. I found them on Canal at a "Hippie" store!!! a heartfelt expression... February 14, 2010 A heart  Something really special happened to me today. I was in the attic looking through my mother’s cedar chest, something that had been there and not opened since my dad died 5 years ago.There were many things there, things I expected like her wedding dress, my dad's red hat, a school picture of my younger brother, a letter to my mom from my cousin. The letter was dated 1971 and the address was simply my mom's name, the name of our street, and our town - no house number, no zip code, no need. Anyway, there, in the chest was something I had never seen before, a heart. It was something handmade and curious, sitting there inside of her cedar chest amongst the old clothes and photos, on what happened to be Valentine’s Day. I am so convinced this was not happenstance.
Think about this : IT'S ONLY AFTER YOU HAVE LOST EVERYTHING THAT YOU ARE FREE TO DO ANYTHING. XOXO p.s. February 10, 2010 Robins  During the coldest part of winter, there were stout robins snacking in my yard.Is this a sign of spring? I searched for an answer and have since learned that in mild climates, such as ours, robins really do not go away; they just change their foraging practices. It seems, in winter, they ditch the worms on the lawn and set off to the woods for berries and fruit. When the ground is cold, earthworms wiggle down beneath the frost line, out of reach. As the spring rains warm the earth, they begin to vertically migrate, only to peek out and be eaten by an anxious robin.Discouraging.The warm earth will encourage earthworms to surface, and they will be the precursor to the return of the robins in our backyards. So, seeing a robin isn’t necessarily a sign of spring, but seeing a robin in your yard with a wiggly worm in his mouth is. til next time. p.s. February 8, 2010 Winter  I wanted to make a bit of an effort to write something yesterday, but I was totally absorbed in the Super Bowl – the New Orleans Saints were all that was on my mind. I am sooo happy. Anyway, Monday came along as always and with it came work, but I did manage to spend a little time outside on Super Bowl Sunday to see a bit of winter. It is a peaceful place in the dead of winter where not much can be done outside and inside is warm and unhurried. I suppose it is this way by design, we need a place on the calendar to slow down a bit and the middle of winter is it. I left my busy (too busy) 2010 life and sat in my depleted vegetable garden and watched my chickens hunt for bugs, all the while getting rid of weeds that remained from the freeze. I watched and felt connected and wished we had not left our agrarian society so far behind. I think we need to be close to the Earth, I think we cannot be so happy when we are so far away. Anyway, I love my chickens and I love my garden
(and the Saints)!!    Till next time, p.s. February 4, 2010 gifts  I am sitting here looking at this blank page wanting it fill it up with something good. My thoughts quickly go to Nature and with that I think of Valentine’s Day?? Anyway, one Valentine’s Day a very long time ago, I was very young and in college away from home. I did not expect much from that day but something wonderful happened. A package was delivered to me in my dormitory. That may seem like a simple thing today amongst the technology so readily available, but in 1973 when people still made collect calls from payphones, it was colossal. Anyway, the package was from my mother. It seems she had planned ahead for its Valentine’s Day delivery – if you would have known my sweet mother, you would know how colossal this was also, being organized was not her strong suit. Inside was a white eyelet spring coat she had made for me, something to keep me warm from the early spring weather and pinned on the collar was a colorful bunch of fruit (plastic). I was the oldest of her children with two more behind me and she had a part time job and she found time to do this for me. Of all the gifts she has ever given, that has to be the most appreciated. It was not something she happened to see at the mall and swiped a card to purchase; it was something she planned and sat there late at night and stitched together and thought of me and cleverly planned the exact arrival date so that I would be happy. I can still see it in my mind and feel it in my heart. You just never know how far reaching the things you do for others will go. Heads up, in 10 days it will be Valentine’s Day; perhaps you can be inspired by my little story about my mom. I assure you a gift of this magnitude cannot be found in Wal Mart or any mall anywhere.
p.s.  February 3, 2010 acceptance 6 more weeks of winter weather...  This is an opportunity to pour through more seed catalogues and get fanatical about my garden. Of course, the garden in my mind never seems to measure up to the one in my yard, but the human spirit is resilient and I will, each year, aspire to a higher order of vegetation. I have learned, by necessity, to see the beauty in imperfection. My feelings have become very genuine and it feels so good to accept things as they are. I have been able to be more accepting about people also – celebrating who they are, celebrating who I am, with all the rough edges and idiosyncrasies – how delightful and how freeing. Anyway, I will have a garden this year, as I do every year and it will produce organic veggies, but I doubt that it will ever be photo ready, but it will have earthworms doing their very important job and important nutrients from my compost pile and plenty of south Louisiana sunshine and I will be happy to harvest its bounty that will help to keep my family healthy. Anyway, I will spend the rest of winter dreaming and when spring comes, I will be accepting.
  Every year on February 2, since somewhere in the 1880s when some friends in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania went into the woods in search of a groundhog on Candlemas Day, the world turns its attention to Punxsutawney Phil, a now, very famous groundhog. It seems February 2 is right in between the winter and the spring solace and this hibernating woodchuck is seemingly the perfect indicator of what is to be in regards to our weather?? Very early in the morning, at sunrise, Phil will come out from his little groundhog burrow at Gobbler's Knob, and he will either see his shadow and run back in or he will not see it and will stay outside. If Phil sees his shadow, legend has it that we can expect six more weeks of winter weather and if he does not, we can look forward to an early spring. Anyway, congratulations for arriving here at the point of mid winter. Just as I love the thought, the image of midsummer and all of its Shakespearian romantic connotations, I love this cozy spot in midwinter. The weather can be a bit uncomfortable, but I suppose it is suppose to be. It forces us to focus on inside matters, things that might need to be tended to, like reading, sleeping more, writing, thinking, and just more moments of contemplation and more time for resting. Think of the groundhog and the bear and all of the other animals that hibernate all winter and think of us, maybe this is a time to slow down before the busyness of spring arrives. Nature is a great reveal, but sometimes, most times, we are too busy to notice her messages. Enjoy this place in midwinter for soon, regardless of what the groundhog sees today, the world, your world, will be bustling with early spring chores and whirlwinds of activities and you will be as busy as the honey bees. So, rest a bit more here in the middle of winter and store some energy and gain some insight and have a happy Groundhogs Day. p.s.
February 1, 2010 JOY My daughter and I went to church last night, somewhat languidly, but it ended up, as always, a good thing. The message was something I needed to hear. It was about “joy” – being joyful. I have heard this before, this encouragement to be joyful, because if you are, there is no room to be anxious, depressed, or angry since we can only accept one emotion at time. True; the challenge is to be joyful. It seems there is something in this adult life to always “distract” you. The answer to this conundrum, according to those who know, is to live in the moment. Again, so true, but sometimes so difficult. I think of children; they are evidence of this suggestion. They are usually happy, joyful; they live in the moment. I agree with all of this, I just have trouble doing it. For instance, I have to tend to something “negative” today so in my apprehension, worry, and dread; I lived it about three times last night. I did this instead of enjoying my peaceful night’s sleep in my comfortable bed in my safe house. So, today, I still have this negative situation to deal with and now I am not rested. I get “it”; I just need to do “it”. Be joyful, for when I am joyful, there is no room for anything else and live in the present, enjoy the moment, tomorrow will take care of itself. My mom was always telling me “take one day at a time”. Anyway, these are my humble ramblings for this day, this moment that I am in, the only moment that I have. "Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the 'Titanic' who waved off the dessert cart."
— Erma Bombeck  till next time, p.s. January 27, 2010 perspectives I don’t seem to have any original thoughts this morning and, as always, I am about to be late for work. I wanted to post something, so I dug around in my arsenal of quotes and found these. I hope they can help to place you in a positive position.
Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without." Buddha "In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer." Albert Camus" "I am an optimist. It does not seem
too much use being anything else." Winston Churchill
"There are always flowers for those who want to see them" Henri Matisse
have a good day; p.s. January 24, 2010 New Orleans The Saints just catapulted Louisiana into an "state" of ecstasy. January 22, 2010 Yesterday I have some little thought rattling around in my head this morning, something I recently read. I think it was generated by someone at school. It was something I heard a while ago, but a little nostalgic email came my way, an email about a time in history so strongly associated with home and my childhood years, and the email made me think about this.The email that provoked this thought was filled with nostalgia and I will not post the entire passage, but I will post a “couplet” that causes quiet a visual for me, “Then there were the picnics at the peak of summer season. Pack a lunch and find some trees and never need a reason”. Anyway, I suppose I should post this little thought that is stirring around in my head, because it is there, speaking to me and I feel I should share it. It was a quote of sorts, but I will paraphrase – We are so busy giving our kids what we never had, we are neglecting to give them what we had. This, as a mother and an educator, speaks volumes to me. and another couplet of inspiration… “In the kitchen on the wall we only had one phone. And no need for recording things. Someone was always home”. till next time, p.s. January 20, 2010 Fat Tuesday Mardi Gras will be on February 16 this year. I continually struggle with this ambulatory date. Fat Tuesday can occur on any Tuesday between February 3 and March 9.This is all tied to Easter, which falls on the first Sunday after the full moon that follows the Spring Equinox. This year, spring begins on March 20 and the full moon that follows is on March 29, therefore, Easter Sunday will be on April 5. Another way to check this conundrum of dates is to count 47 days from Mardi Gras to Easter - 40 days of Lent plus 7 Sunday. I have so much difficulty remembering this little “riddle”. The Spring Equinox is always on March 20, this is a constant date I can remember. I just need to check the Almanac to see when the first full moon after the equinox is and then Easter is the following Sunday – there – simple!  y p.s. January 15, 2010 Potatoes Unfortunately, potatoes are one of the "Dirty Dozen". In February, here in the Deep South, I plant several pounds in my garden. For those of you who do not have a garden, :( , I found this delightful "How To" video from the editor of The Old Farmer's Almanac. I hope you try it. Check planting times in your area. What I like about this method is the opportunity to continually add soil; the more layers you add, the more potatoes the tubers produce. That is why this abundant vertical space will give you a bountiful harvest. Do it; you will discover the difference. The poison stuff you buy in the grocery store is so far removed from home grown and this method, thanks to Farmer's Almanc, is so easy it seems. Be sure to use good soil; the potatoes are inexpensive; spend your money on the soil or better yet, use your compost. We need to be mindful of what we eat. p.s.
January 14, 2010 Haiti p.s. January 12, 2010 Pooh Bear This was at the bottom of an email and I had to share it with you this morning. Do you ever stop loving Pooh?
"If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together.. there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart.. I’ll always be with you".
Winnie the Pooh p.s. January 11, 2010 hard work I had to post this quote. It is by someone you may not expect me to quote, but I really like this implication. Here it is… “We don’t approach things like we are good. We just approach things like we gonna work and we gonna work hard. And hard work pays off. If you work that hard you gonna get good”. Lil Wayne How empowering is that? Something to think about... p.s. January 10, 2010 You were born an original. Don't die a copy. ~John Mason  More musings about yesterday’s entry. I think one of the most difficult things to do in life is to not compare yourself to others, not to measure yourself by the progress or regression of other people – especially those fictitious characters you see on the TV screen. I am writing this in specific reference to art and the challenge to be original, but it is a generic application. We all have uniqueness, but sometimes we get caught up in the propaganda of this high tech, consumer driven society. I think of people like Beatrix Potter and Vincent van Gogh who lived in isolation by today’s standards and the work they produced and the people they were - totally unique. I wonder how dishonest their art would have been had they lived now amongst all the pressure and illusion of what is real. We must look inside and discover ourselves and it is so difficult with all of the intrusions. A place, a physical place is what I think works best at finding the internal place, that place that is the authentic “you”. I have to inject another little saying my son, William, told me yesterday. Again, it is from Nick Saban. His dad used to tell him the "grass was always greener over the septic tank". I love the simplicity and graphics of this statement. I just wanted to write this down for you to remember – it is vivid, so you will think of it often. To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~e.e. cummings, 1955 It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. ~e.e. cummings 
Be you, p.s.
January 9, 2010 You  I am so happy that it is Saturday and the winter weather is something to see from my kitchen window instead of my car windshield. It is very cold here in the Deep South, 23 and feeling like 13. These are numbers we are not accustomed to. I froze my citrus trees last night to try to ensure their lives; I hope it works. I am thankful for this cold; I love the way nature reminds us that She is in charge of this planet.
I am still on this New Year, turning the page mentality. I scare myself sometimes because my thoughts can become radical (radical by my definition). I continually broaden my views and that is so good; I think I am the most accepting person I have ever been. I love that part of me, but it comes with a price. While it is good that I accept all others, it leaves the door open for me to accept all things about myself, like irresponsible thoughts of abrupt changes. As liberally as I want to view the world, I have made choices in my life that have given me responsibilities and I must remind myself of that. I suppose those free floating moments of youth never really leave us, those moments when you want to harness the wind and look life in the eye without fear or intimidation (or sense). I am not being very focused with my words, but I know my thoughts are having a mid life epiphany – how cliché’. I think what I am trying to do is do what I want to do and blow caution to the wind – more clichés’. I want to not be so responsible and I want to fill my days with doing art. There I said it. That will be another goal I have for this New Year. Anyway, I had to start my day making these words public. Stay warm and true to you, p.s.  January 8, 2010 health I don't care to "copy and paste" because I love originality, but I will do just that today. I have read The Blue Zones and I keep up with the website, http://www.bluezones.com. There is an article posted that I wanted to share with you and because it is the new year and we are all trying to make ourselves better, I thought this would be a beneficial "copy and paste" opportunity. Introduction to the Blue Zones C
5 Things You Can Do TODAY To Get Happier!
Written by Dan Buettner Studies show that money can buy happiness, but only until the point where you have enough to cover expenses for food, shelter, health care, and transportation. After that, more money brings diminishing returns. So, where to put your energy and resources if you want to maximize your happiness? 1. INVEST IN YOUR HEALTH – Health is a prerequisite to happiness. In other words, You can't be happy if you're unhealthy. Eating wisely and moving naturally are the best way to get fit 2. CREATE QUALITY FRIENDSHIPS – When it comes to a social network, quality is more important the quantity. Having two good friends who care about you – whether your chips are up or down – is more important than a huge network. We often forget that friends rarely come on their own accord: they require effort, time and nurturing. 3. EXPLORE YOUR RELIGION – World surveys show that religious people are more happy than non-religious people. Religious people are more likely to have a strong social network and to be at peace with their lives and mortality. What to do: if you have a religion, make and effort to reconnect with it. If not, visit four new religous communities in the next three months and see if any of them align with your values. 4. SPEND MORE TIME WITH YOUR HOBBY – Build a model, knit a sweater, climb a cliff, cook a gourmet meal. The point is to spend time engaged in activities wherein you are optimally challenged, you get immediate feedback, you lose sense of time and you do it because it's intrinsically rewarding. Psychologist Mihaly Csíkszentmihályi identifies this state as the state of flow. It is perhaps the best way to achieve authentic sustainable happiness. 5. IF YOU'RE UNHAPPY, MOVE – Where you live has a bigger impact on your happiness than your marital status, income, or even education level. If you are not happy where you are, consider moving. World-wide studies show that the happiest places on earth are not tropical islands but place where you feel secure, people around you have the same level of status as you do and it's easy to find a job that is interesting. 
I hope you find this inspiring.
Remember, "If you don’t take the time to be well, you will have to make the time to be sick". p.s.
January 6, 2010 organics - Peaches
- Apples
- Sweet bell peppers
- Celery
- Nectarines
- Strawberries
- Cherries
- Lettuce
- Grapes (imported)
- Pears
- Spinach
- Potatoes
Please allow me to get on my soapbox for just a bit. These foods are the “Dirty Dozen”. Try to buy these organically. Check out this web site for more info by a nonprofit - the Environmental Working Group (www.ewg.org). Okay that is all I wanted to say. I do not want to be pushy. I have no right to be righteous for I do not get regular checkups and I don’t wear sunscreen and I need to lose weight, etc., but this is something really easy to do that can be good for you.
According to the EWG, you do not need to buy these 12 foods organically. I hope you find this helpful. p.s. January 3, 2010 Gardens It is really cold outside, cold throughout the nation, and a great time to think of seed catalogues and garden plans. I am closing my little section on “gardens”. I have chosen to do this because I am not tending to it as I should and in my effort to simplify, closing it is a good decision for me. I did not want to erase it, however, for it something worth seeing – beautiful gardens of my friends. Anyway, perhaps these colorful pages here in the middle of winter will inspire you and you can take out your pencil and sketch pad and plot out a small piece of your yard that can offer you a huge return this spring and summer. I have always wanted to enjoy photos of actual gardens made by gardeners that get their hands dirty and wipe perspiration from their foreheads and drink from the hose in July when it is blistering and the weeds are there. It seems, however, most that I see in books and magazines are contrived photos of make believe gardens created by hired professionals. While they are certainly lovely to look at, I am not moved nor am I motivated by them. For me, I'd rather see gardens that are imperfectly made, but made from the heart; ones that are examples of passion and pantries of natural food. Anyway, I hope to post photos of those types of gardens here. p.s. 
Alfred Austin:
Show me your garden and I shall tell you what you are.
 
Mrs. Lou's garden There’s a wooden sign that says 1957 when you enter this garden and a feeling that says awesome when you leave. I am fortunate to know the keeper of this garden and have been able to walk through it many times and take in the beauty that she and her late husband have created over a half century. This garden is totally genuine and made from only love and hard work. There was never a designer or any professional assistance in this delightful place; this is here because she must garden. She told me once that the garden is something that motivates her to get up each morning and begin her day – checking to see what may have opened during the night and what may bloom today and gathering vegetables for the table and flowers for the soul. The weeds disappear because of the scratching of the hoe, never chemicals that kill injudiciously, and the vegetables are plump and vibrant from mostly compost and natural amending of the soil. Enchantment  
Joey and Edward's garden It is as though each flower has a purpose and each piece of flora is just as it should be, nothing is by chance, except perhaps the lazy lizards that jump from one clay pot to the next and spend time basking on old brick walls. They are random and I suppose quiet pleased to live in such a place as this garden. As a visitor, you realize immediately that this space is tended to daily and is precedence in the lives of the people who live here. There exists somewhat of a menagerie of birds and puppies that live amongst the plant life also, it is apparent that they too are tended to faithfully. All in all, it is an enchanting, yet very conceivable, set of circumstance that beckons you to stay and inspires you to create. 
Here is a snapshot of the vegetable garden; I felt healthier just standing near it. The little house in the background was once part of a plantation and is now a restoration project that I am certain will be done in a way most suiting to its integrity.
Susie's garden When have you ever seen muscadines growing this beautifully? This garden belongs to my neighbor and everything in it looks as wonderful as these grapevines, perfectly trimmed and trained. I can only aspire to maintain such order and uniformity.   Here is a photo of my concord grapes trying to grip my arbor. Just as soon as they turn the most wonderful shade of purple and are exploding with antioxidants, the birds feast on them.It is very disappointing. I don't mind sharing, but they take everything.
January, 1, 2010 starting over Just wanted to pop in and make an entry. This entry is important to me because I will reread it in 365 days and, hopefully, I will feel good about it. I think of all the potential this new calendar holds and that is empowering. I pray that I and my family and friends are given the gift of each day and that with that gift we, in turn, offer gratitude and contribution. I suppose my biggest hope for the New Year is to become a better person, one small choice at a time, always aware of opportunities to do the best thing. Anyway, I just wanted to write this down so that it would be here on January 1, 2011. Peace, p.s.
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